Critically Low Battery

Critically Low Battery – that’s what my laptop said as I pulled it out to write. And I thought… you know, that describes the way I am feeling right now very well! Isn’t it amazing that our mountaintop experiences are often followed by a walk through the valley? Or is that only me? The last couple weeks I have experienced more of God than any other time in my life, and this week I feel so completely disconnected. There have even been moments where I have felt smothered in a massive cloak of despair and sadness – but for no reason. I have realized that the person that I need to “speak life” to this week – is me. I needed reminding that God is still here. I am looking in the wrong direction. It is almost miraculous the way the burden lifts from my heart the moment I begin to praise the Lord. It is like the light turns on and casts out the darkness that has surrounded me. Suddenly there is joy and peace.

I am thankful that these moments are now more brief than they used to be. I find that I hear the voice of God more clearly – even through the fog, so that I can respond and begin walking in the light again. But I completely understand the way one can be overwhelmed by the darkness. i used to get that way. I always felt like I was drowning. The surface just out of reach. All of the worries and tasks seem to push out God’s voice, but now, I have been reminded to  “seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness and all these things shall be added to you” (Matt 6:33). When I am swallowed up in self pity, I can still make my way to the CD player and put on a praise song. Then as I worship, the cloud lifts and I find strength for the day. God is so faithful!

There is an old song I heard about being on the mountaintop and that if we stayed there then no one else would know that they could go there. We need to come down to tell them. I need to come down and walk through these valleys – the same ones that others walk – but walk them with hope and joy and peace, knowing that I do not walk them alone. It is this hope that I must communicate to others. It is this hope that will draw others to the Lord. As much as I might like to stay on the mountaintop with the Lord, I was created to show others the way. Lord, let me walk these valleys with purpose and find my way back to the mountaintop – with a whole group of friends!

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